In North America, it's playful on dates whereas Germans treat it as a job interview. Many Germans' detailed and analytical nature, however, has boded well for online dating, observes Shoup. They often tend to be more private people who like that it's easy to cautiously get to know someone online first.
While every person is different, there is no doubt that dating websites and apps in Germany are booming, with one in five people using one to meet a potential partner in Stephan, 38, a German living in Berlin, turned to okcupid. He found himself in a more difficult landscape than in his 20s, when he met his long-term partner through work and after a few dates decided they were in an exclusive relationship. With online dating, he has had no problems meeting women, but instead of the third or fourth date evolving into something more serious, it usually ends.
Shy about approaching a woman in German or English, Max, 30, turned to the app Tinder to find a partner, contrary to its application as an app for easy hook-ups.
Why relationships are off the menu in Berlin
Yet in the end he met his girlfriend after a stand-up comedy show. Shoup herself turned to online dating when she did not meet anyone with serious potential in Berlin. In the end she met her dream man - only he lived in Vienna. Now the two are engaged and set to be married in Hamburg, where Shoup has seen a culture more conducive to serious relationships.
Meet new people in Berlin
Even in cities such as Berlin, she advised Germans and expats alike to get involved with meet-ups, whether cooking or dancing, to meet people with similar interests. The group InterNations is another resource for both expats and internationally minded Germans, and where a handful of people she knows have met their mates.
She also urged singles to give speed dating a shot - even if just for practice making small talk with strangers. Where I'm from [in southern Germany] anyone you meet who is not a student is usually there for the long haul. The double-edged sword of dating a German, observed Robbins, is that they will exhibit honesty from the very beginning to the very end. The same culture applies to break-ups, said British expat Laura, whose German boyfriend of three years one day told her that he thought their relationship should end.
In vivid detail, he explained he was interested in an acquaintance and wanted to see where it would go. She contrasted her own story with that of another friend, who found out her American husband was cheating on her when an alert popped up on her phone when she wasn't in the room. Robbins adds that when it comes to dating, she can always rely on Germans to be honest.
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Jobs in Germany Browse jobs Post a vacancy. Email newsletters Newsletter sign-up Edit my subscriptions. Other pages Apartment rentals Noticeboard Discussion forum. A couple by the Brandenburg Gate in Berlin. Whether on the market or coupled up, it's not so easy to meet and date in Germany. The Local talked to a matchmaker and singles across the country to find out the difficulties - as well as the advantages - of dating here.
It's not impossible: the ups and downs of dating in Germany
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It's not impossible: the ups and downs of dating in Germany - The Local
Germans like facts and lists? I guess Americans then like burgers and coke, and British are posh and arrogant. Maybe the main problem is trying to judge a person based on superficial stereotypes. Become a Member or sign-in to leave a comment. Latest headlines Essential phrases and customs to survive the German winter. Germany's baristas compete to create world's top coffee. How well do you know the demographics of German cities?
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