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Women are simply more comfortable around people who remind them of themselves. Many online dating sites like Match. On a dating app like Tinder or Bumble, you can take a quick glance at her photos and bio to see if any common interests jump out. For instance if you find you both love dogs, you could send a message like this:.

Certain words are attention grabbing because they sound delicious.

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Notice how it starts off with a light compliment. Complimenting her will often give you points, but only if you focus on intangible qualities like intelligence or her accomplishments. Paying her a more meaningful compliment is a breath of fresh air for her. Mentioning something yummy-sounding works just as well on dating apps.

In fact, it literally stimulates your brain and makes you feel good. And the better she feels about talking to you, the more likely she is to share her number.

How to write that first online-dating note

The example above is more suited for a dating site where longer messages are the norm, but you can get her talking about herself on a dating app with a short message like this:. Those three elements are crucial if you want to get a response to your online dating opener. Weekday evenings are generally best — many women unwind from a long day at work by firing up a dating app while catching up on Netflix.

According to Nielsen , activity on both OkCupid and Tinder peaks at 9 pm, and usage starts to rapidly decline after 10 pm.

4 Steps to The Perfect Online Dating Message

On Bumble, the real action starts a little earlier, with activity peaking at 6 pm. And if you happen to find yourself stuck inside due to inclement weather like a blizzard, hurricane or rainstorm, put these first message examples to good use. NBC News did a little investigating, and found that bad weather goes hand in hand with increased activity on dating sites and apps.

In many cases, the increase was pretty dramatic. Send her a light-hearted follow up message like this one:. So while you should avoid using netspeak too much, using slang or an unusual greeting is considered a great move. You could always spruce it up a bit and go with a foreign greeting, but make sure you know what it means otherwise you could come off looking like a bit of a Del boy.

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11 Online Dating First Message Examples That Get Responses

While everybody enjoys compliments on their looks, focusing too much on physical looks seems to imply shallowness. Messages using words like beautiful and sexy will more often than not end up getting deleted immediately. Better to focus on interests, or even better, common interests. Talking about your own interests can give the recipient a good idea of what you are like. Nothing starts a conversation quicker than a question, so do yourself a huge favour and simply ask one.

I know this is not marketing school but, like a marketer, you are trying to reel someone in. And just like an ad agency makes a call to action, you can too, by simply asking about an interest or even suggesting a dinner date. Unless you are actively seeking a partner of a specific faith, then it is probably a good idea to leave out any religious words in your first message.

How to Write Your First Online Dating Message

Religion is always a bit of a minefield in the dating game and you really need to be careful not to offend anyone or risk being offended yourself. Strange how in the world of dating we have always been told that self confidence is extremely attractive, but the opposite holds true with regards to online dating.

Putting yourself down or being a little shy or awkward can come across rather endearing. Whereas as over confidence can often be a turn off in a first message. Using the words, awkward, sorry, and apologise gets better results when sending a first message to a woman but not so to a man.

First Message Strategy #2: Connect On Common Ground

Our favourite part of the job at Soulmates is collating the success stories we receive from happy couples that met through our site. Skip to content The Soulmates Blog. Author The Soulmates Team Share.

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